It can be easy to feel stuck - stuck in a job you don’t love, stuck in a creative rut, stuck in a body you don’t feel is the one you want, the list goes on. And it can be easy to mentally pile all the things you want to change up to the point that it feels like an overwhelming amount of work, work that you could never possibly get done. So you stay stuck. Stuck is what you know; it might not be where you want to be, but it’s comfortable. You continue to feel terrible about how stuck you are, but you want a big change, and you want it to be immediate. This is difficult, probably too difficult to handle, so you remain stuck. This stagnant feeling makes you feel awful but…

The cycle continues!!!!!!

It’s frustrating!!!

It feels perpetual and awful and frustrating and can really make you lose your dang mind. BUT, I am here to tell you, things CAN change.

As a person who continually fears that I will not live up to my potential, I know firsthand how the “stuck” feeling can haunt you endlessly and steal joy from every moment you experience. It’s very challenging to have a rich personal relationship, a healthy lifestyle, a fulfilling career, not to mention keeping up with elective experiences like staying well-read and enjoying hobbies. There simply are not enough hours in the day to take care of every single facet of every need that you hold within your person-hood. And of course, it is very easy to get down on yourself when you are not happy in your job, or you have not been exercising, or you have been eating too much junk food, or you aren’t making time to meaningfully connect with people or…the list goes on.

I don’t know if I have made this obvious yet, but in case I have not, the downward spiral of general anxiety about life is one I know well. Luckily, because I am so well-versed, I have created a plan of action. I am going to let you in on my little secret, and I want to put a special emphasis on little. The emphasis is on little because you cannot make huge changes to your life all at once. You cannot automatically get a new job without lifting a finger. You cannot automatically drop 10 pounds just by thinking about exercise. You cannot have excellent dental health just by worrying about flossing and not actually doing it. You cannot meet the love of your life just by stressing about the fact that you have not met the love of your life yet. And if you try to do these things all at once, worry about them all in the same day, you will not move forward. No, my friend, you will remain, you guessed it, stuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk. And that suckkkkkkkkkkks.

So here is my advice - take small steps forward. So you don’t like your job. Start applying to new jobs! I know, looking for a job is like taking on another job, but the difference here is that you are moving towards your new life. You can set a goal - meaningfully apply to 10 jobs a week. That’s just 2 each weekday when you are already in work mode, or maybe that’s 5 on Saturday and 5 on Sunday, or maybe you want to save all 10 for Monday so you can focus on other tasks the rest of the week. Whichever way you slice it, the point is you are putting yourself out there, you are making steps toward change, you are making progress in your goals.

You don’t like the way you look? Are you exercising regularly? No? What exercises do you like to do, and would that be indoors or outdoors? Think about the physical activity that you like doing, and make it a goal to do it 3 times a week. Moving your body will make your brain feel better, and setting a goal amount of times to workout will make you more accountable. Same for eating healthy - make small choices that will help you stay healthy. Cook 2 times a week! Cook as many times a week as you like really! If you don’t like to cook, make sure you are eating a lot of colors and minimize the beige food groups.

Floss more. And when I say more, it should be once a day, but let’s try a couple of times a week? The dentist will love you for it and you won’t have to have painful and expensive dental procedures. (Full disclosure, this is mostly a personal goal and reminder, but probably a good goal for everyone to have.)

If you are feeling stuck in your singledom and would like to meet someone, that is a problem we can break down too. Get out of your routine! If dating apps are your thing, get to swiping! But with those swipes, make sure you actually meet at least one of the people you are chatting with. If you like activities, sign up for a class or team and start meeting some new people. The love of your life may not be in these activities, but maybe their friend is, and that friend becomes your friend, and you and the love of your life get introduced by said friend. And bonus, you have a new friend and activity that you like doing! Be kind to yourself, know that you are worth the world, and confidently try new things. Getting yourself out of your house and into the world is a great first step.

If you are feeling stuck, it will feel all-encompassing, consuming all of your time and energy. Take the power back with making little, small meaningful steps toward the future that you want. Taking these small measures into your capable hands will make you feel stronger, more in control. You are the author of your own story, and darn it you are the protagonist! Give yourself the happy ending you deserve by taking control in small but meaningful ways. You will feel a lot less overwhelmed and a lot like you are moving somewhere instead of stuck in the muck with nothing to look forward to. I am sorry for the small rhyme, but if it drives the message a little closer to home then so be it!!!!!

Make a small change today. You can do it! I believe in you.

This sweet little marmot knows that you cannot sun yourself on that rock without taking meaningful steps up the mountain. It takes guts to achieve your goals, and you can build up your bravery by making little steps to your goal. Be like the marmot … — This sweet little marmot knows that you cannot sun yourself on that rock without taking meaningful steps up the mountain. It takes guts to achieve your goals, and you can build up your bravery by making little steps to your goal. Be like the marmot and scurry up the mountain to get to the coveted sunny rock.